MEMOIR FINAL

FOREIGN EXCHANGE TO TURKEY

Waking up at six a.m. to start my day usually isn’t my thing, but for this, I was ecstatic. I was finally getting a chance to venture into a world unknown to me. I was headed to Turkey with my Foreign Exchange student, Ferda, to complete the second half of our exchange. Even though I was so eager to try out this exchange, doubt flowed through my mind. Was I really ready to go to a foreign country all by myself? I had never been anywhere without a family member, and I really didn’t know what to expect. The whole plane trip there I kept questioning myself, and thinking prejudice things. At fifteen, could I really experience and enjoy a trip like this? Everything seemed to go downhill once I began evaluating myself.

After seventeen hours of flying, we were in Istanbul, Turkey, and I was exhausted and cranky. Ferda received news that our last flight from Istanbul to Izmir was delayed a few hours, so she called her aunt in Istanbul, and she lent Ferda and me her car and driver for a tour around the city. Before I arrived in Turkey, I imagined it to look like the Aladdin movies, and have sand dunes everywhere with exotic architecture and what not, but my first glimpse of Istanbul was nothing like that. Picture your perfect paradise on a Greek island, with blue oceans and cloudless skies; that is was these western Turkish cities look like. The sights I saw were unreal, and I began to slowly peel off the judgmental thoughts I had about the country. Istanbul is one of Turkey’s largest cities; all along the mountains you could see the millions of houses and other buildings. There were brilliant mosques, crowds of people, and the last thing you would expect… beautiful beaches, with sparkling, clear waters. As we drove over the bridge connecting Asia and Europe, I thought to myself how much I wanted to get back into my own bed and fall asleep, but I was overwhelmed with this amazing feeling, and I just couldn’t get rid of it. All I can remember thinking was “Wow! I am really in Turkey. How crazy is this?!” I was a tremendously nervous for my adventure in this peculiar country, but I was ready for it to start.

Soon enough, it was time for us to head back to the airport for our final flight to Izmir, Turkey. Thank God this was only a 45 minute flight; I began to think that I would be stuck in the sitting position forever for all the flying. Once we arrived in Izmir and picked up our luggage, Ferda and I headed off to find her parents. Her dad, Macit, and mom, Shenaz, were waiting eagerly for us at the “Arrivals” exit. As soon as they saw us, they smiled happily and started running toward Ferda. I then felt the first wave of homesickness, and all I wanted was to go back home and hug my own mom and dad. Of course, Macit and Shenaz also gave me a big hug and tried to make me feel like a part of the Şaşzade family, but nothing they did would take away this horrible feeling in my stomach.

Because the Şaşzade’s were staying at their summer home in Çesme, we had ANOTHER hour long drive. By the time we arrived home, it was way past midnight, and I was more than ready to go to bed. The next morning, well, afternoon, considering I woke up at 3 p.m., everyone was already awake. And by everyone, I mean Macit, Shenaz, Ferda, Shenaz’s parents, and two of Ferda’s cousins, Cem and Kerim. I was not ready to meet my entire host family just yet. This sent another overwhelming shock through my body. I was already off to a bad start, I thought. I was completely homesick, and all I wanted to do was call my mom. Every time someone would attempt to talk to me, I would get tears in my eyes. When I was able to speak with my mom, I let it all out, and the tears streamed out of my eyes. “Mom!” I cried, “I just want to come home. I hate it here. They’re all so weird! No one ever speaks English unless I ask them a question. I’m sick of it. Please! Just let me come home already!” My mom finally put a stop to it, and said to me, “If you keep crying every time we speak, I will NOT talk to you until you get home in three weeks. I’ll be checking in with Macit to make sure you’re getting along with Ferda and actually trying to get an experience out of this. I paid way too much money for you to just waste your time in Turkey.” That was enough for me. Once I heard my mom wouldn’t talk to me, I never let another tear fall.

Over the next few days, Macit and Shenaz did everything in their power to include me with their family, and make me feel at home. They thought I was too skinny, and so they would place a meal in front of me any time I was just sitting around. I knew I would never go hungry with these people. Food was one of the first things to start opening my mind to the new culture. Everything they ate was so different from American hot dogs and hamburgers. I surprisingly really enjoyed the Turkish food (desserts and a sandwich called a “Kumru” became staple parts in my diet).


I was fortunate enough to be hosted by an upper-class family, and so we were able to take many trips around to historical sites in Turkey. My favorite two, which really opened my eyes, were Ephesus (a major city in ancient Anatolia) and the Virgin Mary’s home. They were the most breath-taking places I have ever been. I actually saw where the Virgin Mary lived after her son was born. These excursions taught me a lot about the Turkish culture and history. I was really starting to open up and appreciate everything about the beautiful country.


During my time in Turkey, I was able to meet many of Ferda’s friends, and actually become very close with three of them, Idil, Ipek and Aylin. I was very wary when meeting new people here, not knowing what to expect when I was introduced. Almost all of the teenagers I met here knew how to speak English, which made my whole experience much easier. I learned that Turkish and American teenagers are very much alike. We’re interested in the same things, like music (they mostly listen to American Rap!), partying and clubbing, shopping, going to the beach, all of those sorts of things. I was so surprised that we were so much alike, even though we were from complete different cultures, and on total opposite sides of the world. I was never taught much about Turkey, or even the Muslim culture, so I just kind of grouped them with Middle-Eastern Muslims, with all the women wearing headdresses, covering their whole body, and everyone being ultra-conservative. I was proved wrong when I made all these new friends.

Three weeks later, it was over. Even though Ferda and I didn’t get off to a great start in America, we became as close as sisters during the second half of the exchange. She helped me a great deal in overcoming my irrational fears and made sure I was okay every step of the way. It was the last thing I expected when we first met. As I walked to my gate in the airport, Ferda turned to me and said, “Julia, you don’t even know how much I will miss you! I love you so much!” She then began to cry, which made me cry as well. I replied, “I will miss you even more Ferda, you are one of my best friends. Seriously. I love you too!” All of my previous judgmental notions about Turkish people were replaced with real life experiences and true knowledge. I grew very close to the Şaşzade family; I still talk to Ferda every week. What I thought would be three weeks of Hell turned out to be the best time of my life. All I needed to do was let go of my prejudices and open my mind to new, and somewhat intimidating, ideas. Ever since I got back home, it is all I can talk about, even now three years later. I feel so blessed that I was able to have an experience that turned my whole life around, and I hope that everyone has a chance to do so one day.